Male integrity scale
Contents
About
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NEWSFLASH: I've also published a shorter version of this article to medium.com! Please support me by adding a "clap" at: The Male Integrity Scale |
The 0 to 10 "Male Integrity scale" below was created to inspire men to strive for higher standards of integrity. To inspire us men to become better humans. I may share this on Facebook and highlight a few men I consider exemplars in the dance community, such as Adrian in Brisbane... Steven Melter in San Francisco, and Sam in Seattle. In 2024 I find myself teaching dance workshops, and so recognizing those who maintain beautiful, safe and respectful spaces is inspiring for me also.
My Graphical Representation of the "Male Integrity scale" (0-10)
Why Not a Universal Integrity Scale?
If all genders displayed similar behaviors regarding power, this could simply be called a “Power Integrity Scale.” However, observations suggest that the dynamics can differ significantly. All female instructors I’ve encountered naturally create safe and respectful spaces. Many men seek out or take advantage of the kind of trust, opportunity and power dynamic that comes with any kind of instructor position. It is similar for male versus female bartenders. It's a position of power that men often take advantage of because it puts women in a vulnerable state (in that case by serving them alcohol). Even within the modern male, female dynamic, it's usually the male who is in the more powerful position (even if it's just because men are physically larger), and so even if it's just a small workshop with half a dozen people, it's an important responsibility to keep other safe.
Advocates of Consent
When I look at the scale above, I think hard about what steps a male can take to make everyone safe, and it involves being an advocate of consent. For conscious dance, we have a nice little guide to teaching consent that seems to work well here:
Why Teachers Should Separate Flirting from Teaching
It is easy for any man or woman to speak about consent culture but still put out heavily flirty or sexual vibes that make participants uncomfortable, even if the flirting isn't directly at them. While there are respectful ways to flirt, facilitators should ultimately know that many women and men will decide to start or stop coming based on those little moments of comfort and discomfort. One bad seed can ruin the dance for a lot of people. I've heard multiple stories now about particular male facilitators who have been banned from certain communities for being too handsy around new females.
The Importance of Integrity in Positions of Power
It’s essential to always advocate for a culture of consent and respect. New people arrive often at these events, so everyone should receive the same thoughtful guidelines and encouragement to speak out whenever they feel uncomfortable. This applies to everyone, regardless of gender or sexual orientation. At an amazing workshop called the Atlas Project, they have explicit rules that no instructor, volunteer or even student is allowed to pursue (i.e. ask out and date) anyone else in the course unless 30 days after the workshop, when the effects of that high emotional vulnerability would have worn off.
Motivation for This Article
The motivation behind this scale stems from a friend of mine in the United States who called me and told me about a nasty experience she'd had with a contact improv instructor. I'm proud to say she stood up to him and spoke out, and it turns out he's been a repeat offender and is now banned from certain communities. He somehow sticks around, bouncing between the US and Europe and generously offers female students free lessons or massage because he sees "potential". I'm not going to name and shame, but rather just be really proud of my friend for speaking out.
Men, in particular, should regularly reflect on their behaviour and strive to improve. Personally, writing a book on consent made me more aware of my actions and the importance of attunement, and writing this little article is a huge reminder that I teach now, and I really aspire to keep our incredible Brisbane Ecstatic Dance event safe, and better and better versed on consent. This scale is a tool to help us all aim higher and appreciate those who consistently exemplify integrity.
Sincerely,
Andrew Noske
See Also
- Healthy Friend Group Scale - quite similar, but think more "peer group" (like a little group of male or female friends) versus an organisation.
| Acknowledgements: My wonderful friend G who inspired this scale, and for her deep conversations about friendship and support. |
